I’ve been having nightmares every night for the past nine months. It started when I began noticing little things around me change. I lost my best friend to cancer three years ago last February, and last summer (around the time I started noticing things change), I decided to try and talk to him. I was desperate and needed to know he was there. I started talking to the air, meditating, practicing little spells I found online. I looked into white magic and mediums and psychics: anything, just so I could talk to David again. It was around that time that I started giving up on the light stuff and wanted to go deeper: I pulled out a Ouija board I had found in the attic a few years before and decided to settle this. I was going to talk to him.
Nothing seemed to happen when I did the ritual. I was by myself, yes, but I followed everything from greeting to ending the ouija board ritual to the T. I was let down, but I didn’t know what I expected. I started noticing little things change shortly after like lights flickering, cold spots in the room, the feeling of a presence, hearing small distinguishable sounds like footsteps/coughs/whispers, but never being able to pinpoint where they were coming from (as if they were coming from my own head). I thought it was him trying to talk to me. I was elated.
But then the nightmares started. Horrible, vivid nightmares of death, abandonment, blood, drowning, stabbing, cutting, screaming, murder, fear, helplessness, pain, suffering, hate. All of the terrible things in the world you can imagine, stuffed into night after night of waking up in a cold sweat, convincing myself it wasn’t real.
Besides the small things I notice during the day (e.g. shadows out of the corner of my eye, the sounds/presences/cold spots I was hearing and feeling, general paranoia, etc), the nightmares have been the worst and biggest indicator of them all. My religions teacher noticed something off about me when she saw the bags under my eyes, and gave me a pendent of the Virgin Mary to “protect me”. She had no idea what was going on, but I feel like she felt something. I knew she felt something around me, and from the minute I put the pendent on, I felt a heaviness in my chest. As if something in my body didn’t want any religious article on my person.
The nightmares are relentless and only get worse with time. The more I notice what’s going on, the more it happens. I’m frightened. Was it because of the ouija board? Did I bring something evil into my life? What is happening to me? Will the nightmares get worse? How do I stop this?
I feel as though I brought something into my life. Not necessarily from the Ouija board, but from somewhere. I don’t know. Something is around me, near me, in me, I don’t know. But it speaks to me through nightmares, subtle images out of the corner of my eye, paranoia, and my fears. I’m so afraid, and I think whatever is doing this to me thrives off of my fear. Someone please help me figure out what this is.
Asked by M Kathy